One Powerful Question to help Quick-Start Positive Change in your Life

When I was first asked this question, I found it instantly helped me to think differently about certain aspects of my life. As I wrote down the answers, it very quickly became clear to me that if I acted to sort out the parts of my life that I was just putting up with, life would be better, certain relationships would improve, I’d have increased focus, less stress… Ask yourself this one question:

What am I tolerating in my life right now?

What is a toleration? Quite simply it’s stuff you’re putting up with that bothers you – this can be something seemingly minor like a cluttered corner of your house or office that you know needs to get sorted, and it can be something rather large, such as a colleague who is so negative, they drain your energy. Tolerations are things that without which, your life would be better. These can be eliminated with huge benefits to you such as decreased frustration and stress, clearer thinking, more time, better health and energy – a better life.

The first step in eliminating tolerations is to name them. Ask yourself now: What am I tolerating in my life right now?

See listed below some examples of tolerations to help start your thinking process – everyone’s tolerations will be different as everyone’s view of life is unique.

Examples of tolerations include:

1. A long commute to and from work
2. The milk being left out of the fridge after being used
3. The clutter under your stairs or on your desk
4. The shoes you trip over every time you enter a certain room
5. A colleague who moans and never ever says something positive
6. Another colleague who presents you with problems – never solutions
7. Missing your exercise class for various reasons
8. Your family member who depends on you for absolutely everything
9. Your friend who always cancels at the last minute
10. Your wardrobe that needs a clear out
11. Your coffee habit that adversely affects your skin – and maybe your sleep
12. Your boss who constantly puts you down or overloads you with work
13. That stack of personal paperwork that’s on your mind yet you’ve done nothing about it
14. Your employee who doesn’t pull their weight
15. Drama and gossip
16. A nagging family member
17. Your lack of confidence
18. Being too busy
19. Poor sales results from your team
20. Your perfectionism
21. Someone else’s perfectionism
22. Lack of personal responsibility
23. Guilt
24. Sadness
25. Worry about “what might happen”
26. Not making time to meet your friends
27. Dishonesty
28. Poor habits like always being late, biting your nails, eating too many cookies
29. Excuses
30. Boredom
31. Too many social commitments
32. Unhealthy relationships
33. Staying up so late, you’re always tired the next day
34. Inaction
35. Procrastination
36. A “to do” list that never gets finished
37. Fear of speaking up
38. No time to think
39. Too much debt
40. Lack of fun and laughter in your life
41. The neighbours dog barking all night
42. The printer that keeps breaking down
43. The employee who always misses deadlines
44. The pile of books you really want to read but haven’t
45. That friends weekend away that has been planned for years but hasn’t happened yet
46. Your hairstyle that needs updating
47. Your car that needs washing
48. Your garden that’s a mess
49. That unwritten book you know you want to write
50. Those “thank you” cards you need to send

When making your Tolerations List, aim for as many as you can. Try for a minimum of 10 and up to 20 for a more complete picture of what you need to eliminate from your life.

When you have completed your list, I suggest eliminating the easiest ones first. Some people like to tackle the biggest tolerations but I have always found that de-cluttering the actual tolerations list gives me a great sense of satisfaction and motivates me to tackle bigger issues. You can look forward to your clearer, less-frustrated life where you have more time, energy and joy. You can use a page and plot it out like the example below.

Enjoy!